Tis the Season....

Each year before the holiday season arrives, I tell myself that it will be different.  I think that for once I'll just relax and enjoy it, without allowing myself to get stressed or frustrated.  I'm honest and must confess that once again, I'm in a rut! 



It's nice to see the decorations all around me and listen to the festive music.  I like to hear others share all about what they will be doing over the break from work and school.  Somehow there is just always something missing for me...

There is so much that I am thankful for.  I have Jesus as my Lord and Savior, I am loved by my wonderful husband and children, I have an incredible family and great friends.  My job is amazing and I am healthy.  So why in the world do I just want this week to be over already?

I cannot help but wonder why there is such a push to commercialize Christmas.  I am one who has always celebrated it by acknowledging the birth of Christ along with getting a tree and gifts to open on Christmas morning. We have always made cinnamon rolls and put candles in them before singing happy birthday to Jesus after opening our gifts.  While I am aware that Jesus was not actually born on the 25th of December (according to evidence I've read, it is more likely in the Spring or early Fall), I do like celebrating His existence in my life.

The main thing I dislike about the holidays is shopping.  I am probably one of the only women who does not enjoy it!  Most people love to go out and look around and think of creative gifts that will be well received and loved by the recipient.  I, however, am not that way.  I am so indecisive, and I second guess myself to the point of just deciding to walk out of the store with nothing instead of picking something that I'm afraid the person will not like.

I don't ever want just one day to have to represent how much I love and care about my family and friends.  I live my life trying my best to show them how much I appreciate and value them every day.  I do this through offering a helping hand, prayers, encouraging words, conversation and through supplying their needs in whatever way I am able to.  I want that to be enough.

Does this sound mean?  Selfish? Rude?  I certainly don't mean it to come across that way.  So many emotions are swirling through my brain today.  Why the unnecessary pressure?  I'm sure I place it on myself.  I need to just rest assured that what I do and offer is enough.  Now just to make myself believe it...